Feed with Love and Respect

I am going to be starting a new series of posts regarding food. Food obviously plays a huge role in anyone's life, especially as Americans, we have nightly love affairs with food, and most warm and fuzzy family holiday's are centered around it. For us, food is a struggle. We were raised very differently, thus shaping palates and tastebuds that sit in direct opposition to each other. It is now my goal to come to some happy and healthy medium.

I've been doing LOTS and LOTS of reading lately, on everything from Traditional Foods, to Paleolithic Eating, to the Body Ecology diet, to gut flora and probiotics, to GFCF, to Vegan living and Bento lunchboxes, to the over-dairy-fication of America, the 11 best foods you likely aren't eating, the importance of Cod Liver Oil, kefirs and kombuchas, to methylation pathways (still totally confused on that one), to phytic acid, the health benefits of liver and most importantly, being a loca-vore, the relationship between food and health, and really just how important the quality and type of food you eat impacts your body. I am spending a lot of time learning from the Mothering Mamas on the Nutrition & Healthy Eating board and I am trying to find the right balance of how to incorporate all that I have learned. Food is especially difficult for our family as we try to balance our health, our sanity, and a refluxy baby. I could eat grass every day and be content, whereas it might drive the big guy absolutely bonkers. I am striving for yummy (ok, edible) meals that help the big guy on his quest to drop a few pounds, excellent nutrition and varied tastes for the little guy, and enough calories to keep this nursing momma from starving, without us going broke at Whole Foods.

I'll be honest, its been really hard. And you wouldn't think that food could be such a big deal right? Its just food. Well, when you tell a tiger to eat like a rabbit, the tiger gets angry. When you work hard to do the best for your family but nobody is happy, its hard. But like any habit that needs to be broken, the breaking point is the low before the healing and acceptance can begin.

What I want to focus on today is why I am doing this. It's not just about following a tenant of AP, its my goal of always doing better and more for my family. I am not a complacent individual, I see room for improvement in almost all aspects of our life. Not that I don't appreciate the good stuff, I just always see where we could treat ourselves, our bodies, each other, better.

So, this stems from my interpretation of Dr. Sears' 2nd Principal of Attachment Parenting, which is to "Feed with love and respect". When I first got into AP, this statement always stood out to me; it conjures up lots of feelings regarding todays parents and the growing obesity rate in our kids. It's a pretty simple statement in of itself, but can have varied meaning depending on the individual. First and foremost, I see the love and respect as it relates to breastfeeding, acknowledging that is the best possible start in life for my child, and I respect the ability and design of my body to do so. I also see this related to breastfeeding as respecting my child's wishes on when this phase of his life will be over. All that being said, I am a happily breastfeeding momma with no intention of stopping at any predetermined mark.

As it relates to solid foods, the "respect" part, for me, relates to a child's natural abilities and motor skills made for self feeding, which is why we went down the "Baby Led Weaning" path, and had Chase choose his foods and learn to feed himself. In addition, I see "respect" as guiding what I choose to make as options for meals. I respect his body, the little infantile temple, that hasn't yet been ravaged by processed, dyed, manufactured, or genetically modified foods. So for our little guy, he almost always has organic food, and its always fresh, save for his 1/2 jar of Earth's Best prunes that help his constipation. As you have seen in our BLW posts, lots of fresh fruits and veggies, and just recently starting to add protein with eggs, chicken, steak, white fish and salmon. And maybe, just maybe, I am a little too strict, but I don't do Gerber puffs b/c I can't pronounce all the ingredients, so we have happily held out for the release of HappyBaby organic puffs.

Looking to the future, how do I interpret this "Feed with love and respect" thing? Well, for the baby, I think that laying the foundation for healthy eating habits is on track. I really don't think that limiting foods, or what is in the house, will make a rebellious eater later in life. Rather, taste preferences for the healthy stuff will be established early, and he won't gravitate towards the bad stuff. I don't understand "picky eaters" and I really don't understand, as I have been told that "kids will go through a mac-n-cheese phase, everyone does." I just can't comprehend not having an array of food to choose from and eating mostly healthy stuff, temper tantrum throwing toddler or not. Sometimes love and respect, for me, may mean going to bed hungry or a tad peeved you didn't get your way. Health is #1 in my book, and we don't get a do-over.

I also apply it to my husband; love means I can't sit back anymore and let his old habits rule and ruin his health. Its making dinner at home a time to reconnect, getting the same warm and fuzzies out of our nightly ritual, while mawing down on the good stuff, not just chew and screw, or chew and boob tube. Its helping the entire family transition to a new lifestyle, a new thought process, and a new beginning. Out with the old dogmas of "Milk does a body good" and the Food Pyramid. We will find our way, together, and we'll come out on the other side a happier and healthier family!

my next post will be about what we actually ARE eating, so look for that in the coming days.....